Being Normal

Who in their right mind would tell people to be normal? What does normal even mean. When I look it up in the dictionary (or on dictionary.com), one of the definitions that it gives is the following. “Conforming to the standard or the common type; usual; not abnormal; regular; natural.” So in other words it is not anything weird or unstructured. Pardon my language, but screw being normal. In my mind, being normal is a waste of time. Yes, some things are meant to be normal or regularly structured, but a lot of things (in fact, pretty much everything else) is not meant to be normal.

I have opened up before and shared some of the challenges I have had with my learning disability. For those of you who do not know about my LD (learning disability) I am going to describe some of the history behind it. When I was born, I was diagnosed with a loosely defined “hypotonia” (also known as low muscle tone). I did not know how to use my muscles to walk and talk (in fact my parents thought I would never be able to talk). I have a hard time receiving and understanding information. I also have short term memory issues. Here I am 25 years later after going through many years of speech and occupational therapy. I was also in special education up until I was in middle school (and I graduated from special education in middle school). I am truly thankful for the countless amount of support I had to get over my learning challenges (and I still have many challenges to this very day too). That list includes my parents (because they were very much new in learning about this), my speech and occupational therapists, as well as my teachers and everybody else who I forgot to mention before.

I felt like it was important to share some of the history behind my LD because I hope people begin to understand me better, but also because my learning disability is a part of my own normal. In fact I have a shirt that says “Be your own normal.” I used to be a little embarrassed by my LD because I did not want to get any special treatment and I wanted to be just like everybody else. I do not think that it was until in high school and college that I began to embrace it because I realized that my LD is a huge part of who I am. So when people say to be normal or be like other people, I really want to say screw it.

Yeah, there are people who are like me (with their disability and challenges), but in my mind everybody has their own definition of “normal.” I cannot help but be weird and unordinary (so what?) That is what people should really like about you, that you are like nobody else. There is this quote by Dr. Seuss that says “Why fit in when you were born to stand out?” And I really have to agree with him. If everything was normal and everybody fit in, what is the point? This world would be too normal and too ordinary. No, that will not work.

I know that I have said a lot in this post, but that is because this subject is very important to me. You really should not listen to other people and what they have to say anyways. I do have one more quote to share before I include the poem for this post. This is a quote that I find highly motivating and in part, has inspired me to write this poem. The quote by the way is by Michelle Rose Gilman (she has become one my role models and she is a huge inspiration to me as a woman. She has her own business called Well-Heeled Warrior). “She had a gypsy soul and warrior spirit. She made no apologies for her wild heart. She left normal and regular to explore the outskirts of magical and extraordinary.” Here is the poem, now included. I hope that my readers enjoy. Here is one last reminder for my readers and everybody else and that is to not be afraid to find your own normal because like I said before everybody has their own definition of normal. I hope that everybody embraces who they truly are. Cheers!!!!
Her Own Normal

She never wanted to be normal. What she wanted
Was to be wild and crazy, but in her eyes that was
Perfectly okay. It was never in her blood

To have a calm heart. She did not want applause.
She always wanted to roam and be set free.
She did not care if people’s jaws

Hit the floor or not. She wanted to be airy
And full of light. She still had this fire to her
That nobody else had. She wanted so badly

To prove people wrong. She had this desire to stir
Everything up until everything became so mixed
And jumbled together so that everything became a blur.

She is not looking to be mended or fixed
So she can look like everybody else. She is meant
To be broken and tangled. She always nixed

The idea of being completely normal. She is spent
And tired of living up to all the high standards.
She wants every part of life to have a dent

And cracks. She did not want to go backwards
In time when the past is in the past and she
Was never looking for the correct answers.

She is not looking for mistakes. She just wanted to be
A part of something new, fresh and out of the box.
That woman will always be the whole part of me.

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Elena

I was born and raised in the Bay Area. Growing up, I went to Berkeley public schools up until I left California to attend McDaniel College, located in Westminster, MD. I graduated from McDaniel College with a B.A. in Theatre Arts with a focus in Acting.

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