Category: Maya Angelou

Evolution of the Butterfly

I think there is so much we can learn from a butterfly. It comes from a cocoon, turns into a caterpillar and then evolves into a butterfly. It goes through the different stages in life. That is what this post is about and I thought now would be a perfect time to share this post since we are a little more than halfway through the year. To start off I want to bring up a quote by one of my favorite poets, Maya Angelou. She says “We delight in the beauty of the butterfly, but rarely admit the changes it has gone through to achieve that beauty.” So in other words, butterflies represent change and becoming a butterfly does not simply happen overnight. A butterfly grows, adapts and goes through life-altering changes. We have to appreciate the changes it goes through to become a butterfly. There is so much more I can say, but I think that I will leave it there.

Blooming Butterfly

From the cocoon she grows
Into something big, lovely,
Bold and majestic. She shows
Us that life is about recovery
And surviving through any
Storm. How I want to be like
Her, flying and even with many
People doubting her despite
Her strength – she conquers all.
She breaks through every wall.

Disrespect of Women

There are so many topics we all get sick and tired of hearing about. One of those is the disrespect of women, especially with the whole thing around Donald Trump and Harvey Weinstein. It is the 21st Century, but it makes me feel like we are back in the ’50s or something because we are still treating women with disrespect almost every single day. It makes me sick and tired because women deserve better. We have to do a better job as a country and as a nation to take better care of our women. After all, we come from women, so what gives us a right to disrespect women? Tupac pretty much says it the same way. He says “A woman brought you into this world, so you have no right to disrespect one.” And he pays homage to them in his song “Keep Your Head Up” where he raps about how women should be treated better. Here is a sample from that song. “And since we all came from a woman/Got our name from a woman and our game from a woman/I wonder why we take from our women/Why we rape our women, do we hate our women?/I think it’s time to kill for our women/Time to heal our women, be real to our women/And if we don’t, we’ll have a race of babies/That will hate the ladies, that make the babies/And since a man can’t make one/He has no right to tell a woman when and where to create one!/So will the real men get up/I know you’re fed up ladies,/But keep your head up/(Keep ya head up) Oooh, child things are gonna get easier/(Keep ya head up) Oooh, child things’ll get brighter/(Keep ya head up) Oooh, child things are gonna get easier/(Keep ya head up) Oooh, child things’ll get brighter…” So he is telling women to keep their heads up and telling the guys to respect women.

It really disgusts me how we can elect a president who disrespects women every day with rape, sexual harassment, etc. The list goes on and on. One thing about respecting women is believing them when they step forward and speak up about those things I just mentioned. That support needs to happen right now. That starts with women respecting other women. I know society has taught us to tear each other apart and to speak bad about each other. That all needs to stop. In other words, we need to have a strong community of women. Sophia Nelson says it like this. “Be a woman other women can trust. Have the courage to tell another woman direct when she has offended, hurt or disappointed you. Successful women have a loyal tribe of loyal and hones women behind them. No haters. Not backstabbers or women who whisper behind their back. Be a woman who lifts other women.” If we start there we can just do about anything. To continue more about this I want to throw in one similar like the one above, which I got from Amber Riley’s story on Instagram (she was in the TV show “Glee”). She wrote “Part of my 2018 focus will be creating deeper roots with my girls we really do need another creating a safe environment where we all feel we can share triumphs and failures.” In other words we need to make it safe for every woman.

I wrote this post purposefully almost exactly a year after the Women’s March. We went and participated in one in Oakland. It was such a wonderful experience. We went to another one this year (it was yesterday in fact). It was a wonderful turnout at this one and at other marches across the country, even across the world. I think the way to stop all of this disrespect is to continue to speak up, protest and do whatever it takes to be heard because like I said, it is something I get tired of hearing about. In fact, we should not even be talking about it today, but we are! We are going to continue to talk about it always. To quote my hero Maya Angelou “Each time a woman stands up for herself, without knowing it possibly, without claiming it, she stands up for all women.” So in other words, once one woman or in this case, one group of women, can stand up for all women. It takes a lot of work, but I know we can do it. So here is to the end of the disrespect of women although there are many other groups that are disrespected like immigrants, Blacks, Latinos, etc. and we should not forget that. Enjoy and march on!! I am with you all!

The Disrespect of Women

Women of every race, religion, shapes and sizes
Getting mistreated everyday, not making the same
Amount of money that men are. We are no prizes
To anyone but ourselves. When we have no game
Or hustle, but we bust our asses off just to get food
On the table and make a name for ourselves. Catcalls
From the street when we just simply walk by. Nude
Bodies admired when we are a size zero, but falls
Short when we have any extra body fat. Being called
Bitches and whores when we show off too much skin.
Being threatened, beaten, blackmailed or being hauled
Away when all we said was no thank you. When we grin
We are too easy. When we are frowning we are told to
Loosen up and smile. When we are supposed to please
Men and never ask any questions of why? The queue
Of men allowed to abuse and rape us repeatedly. Sleaze
Balls staring at us and asking us for our numbers when
We said we are not interested or already have a man
At home. They think they can write all over us with pen
Like we are their property and thinking they think they can
Hit us all they want to because we are small fragile creatures.
They lecture us when we have sinned and are too much of
A temptation for men. They think they become preachers,
Luring us into traps. We are told we are not worthy of love
Or respect when we want to be alone and without anyone
Else. Those lies we are being fed will always be outrun.

Hard Times and Struggling

There are many moments (in our life) where we struggle and have difficult times. Some last a short while, but others last a whole lot longer. I found this amazing quote that I believe sums it all up. “Embrace the struggle and let it make you stronger. It won’t last forever” (said by Tony Gaskins). In other words, do not let your struggles or hard times keep you from breaking down and being weak. Every struggle and hardship is supposed to make you stronger/unbreakable. There is this saying that says that you have to go through the bad times before you can get to the good times. That is just how life works. You may try to blame other people or things that just go wrong, but you have to remember that you are the one who are going through these hard times and nobody else.

I get that life is not always fair, but that is just how life goes. We all have our ups and downs (sometimes a lot more downs), but we cannot allow them to dictate our life. I am in my 20s and still struggling, but at least I am trying to rebuild my life. In fact, I have been trying to rebuild my life since I finished college a few years ago. The good thing about rebuilding your life is that you get to decide who you want to be and what you want to do with your life. I was explaining this to a friend of mine (about rebuilding my life) and she put it in a great way (that I have never really though about before). She said “Everybody goes through those phoenix stages, burning up and starting over again.” I feel like that is a great metaphor, not only for my life, but for those around me because we all go through those stages in life. To quote the ever wonder Maya (again) from one her most famous pieces “Still I Rise,” she says “But still, like dust, I’ll rise.”

Regardless whatever hardship or obstacle or whatever storm comes your way, I promise you that you will eventually get through it. So this piece goes to all my readers who are having hard times and who are struggling (in whatever capacity). May you as Maya and I say…”Still I Rise.” May we all be phoenixes and continue to get through our hardships and times of struggle by rebuilding our lives (sometimes from the ground up). We will eventually find ourselves.

Like a Phoenix

Always keep walking on with your head

Held high up like a queen on her mission.

Even if you are going through bad times

 

Remember that life is like an audition.

It is all trial and error in life. Although

You want to mope, show your ambition

 

And do not let anyone dull your glow.

We are all phoenixes rising up from

The ashes. We all continue and plough

 

On through uncertainty. Stand firm

Through all the fire, rain and every storm.

I know you are stronger than every crumb

 

And rock below your feet. You will transform

Into something magnificent and wonderful, my

Dear. I can promise you that. Do not be lukewarm.

 

When the dusty ashes will be settled and be dry,

Then you will be beginning to rebuild your life

From the ground up. You are meant to soar and fly.

Being Thankful and Grateful

It is hard to believe that November is coming to an end (pretty soon I might add) and it is that time of year when we start to think about all the things we are grateful/thankful for (mostly because of Thanksgiving). Thanksgiving dates back a long time ago in our history when the Pilgrims came over on the Mayflower, but I do not know the exact history. When I look up the definition of Thanksgiving in the dictionary, it defines Thanksgiving as “the act of giving thanks; grateful acknowledgment of benefits or favors, especially to God” (dictionary.com). I personally do not think of Thanksgiving as a religious holiday (as someone who comes from a non-practicing and non-religious family although I am Catholic/Jewish). I just think of it as another holiday to celebrate with loved ones with lots of food and laughter.

Being thankful and grateful should never have to be religious (and it should not be forced upon anybody as such).  Even though I think about all the things I am thankful for (and trust me, I have a lot of things I should be thankful/grateful for), I also think about those who may not be as lucky (like those who are living on the streets or those who are alone without family and friends). The other part of Thanksgiving is the giving part. You can never do wrong by giving (and I know that is something I can work on it). As much as we want to complain/argue about the things we do not have, we should not have to focus on those things. It is all a part of being thankful/grateful for the things we already have. There is this quote I found (in the spirit of Thanksgiving that is coming up this week). “Give thanks with a grateful heart” (Thessalonians 5:6).

So I hope that all my readers have a wonderful Thanksgiving (no matter where you are or who you celebrate it with). I just want to take this moment to thank all of the people who have continuously supported me and for all the things I am lucky to have (like endless love from my family and friends), a roof over my head, laugher, clothing, and food to eat. I hope that everybody realizes that there is always something (no matter how big or small it might be) to be thankful/grateful for. Demi is the one who says that (although the quote is really said by Oprah Winfrey) “Be thankful for what you have; you’ll end up having more. If you concentrate on what you don’t have, you will never, ever have enough.” And in this poem I echo a key part from Maya Angelou’s “Phenomenal Woman.” P.S. I just want to give a special shout out to K (wherever this person is) because although we have had our ups and downs I am still truly grateful/thankful for having you in my life.  

A Taste of Freedom and Thankfulness

A phenomenal woman, words
Echoed by my hero, Maya Angelou.
Fly home free like the birds.

You are every color, shade and hue
Of the rainbow. Never let the rest
Of the world keep you sad and blue.

Be continuously thankful and blessed
For everything you could ever possess.
Love, family and friends. Drive out west

Where you can taste freedom and say yes.
See every sunset and count all of the stars.
Remember every soft touch and caress.

Live life and sit on the handlebars
Instead of sitting in the passenger seat.
Nobody would be pointing at your scars

From every scrape and bruise. Defeat
All the haters and all of the doubt.
Never let anybody or anything mistreat

You or your trust. You should shout
It out from the rooftops because that is
Who you are and what you are all about.

True Colors

Everybody knows that song by Cyndi Lauper “True Colors.” If you do not what I am talking about, the chorus goes something like this:

“And I’ll see your true colors

Shining through

I see your true colors

And that’s why  love you

So don’t be afraid to let them show

Your true colors

True colors are beautiful

Like a rainbow…”

Of course seeing someone’s true colors is not always that bright and peachy. We wish it would happen that way, but the truth is that it does not. I have to admit that I learned it the hard way. Sometimes you have to be careful when someone shows you more than two versions of themselves. There is usually one version of themselves when they are out in public in front of others and then the other version of themselves is when they are in a private place or with loved ones they trust. Then there are some people (a rare coincidence I believe) who are always the same. Some people have a need to hide behind masks, but that is for another time.

One of the worst parts is when you get to know someone and you think you know their true colors, when the truth is that you do not. That is one of the worst feelings in the world and trust me, I know that all too well. There is this quote by Maya Angelou (one of my favorite people who sadly passed away at least a few years ago) and she says “When someone shows you who they are, believe them the first time.” I love that quote and I have kept it close to my heart after one of my aunts told me this quote (I did not know that it was Maya at the time). I want people (who are reading this) to keep that quote in mind because there will be a time where you come across a person like that. I know it is hard, but you have to believe them the first time because you may try to deny it all you want, but that is who they are. People have to be careful because there could be that one person who they love and admire so much, but it may be a different story when you get to know them in a more private setting. All of a sudden, they are a completely different person and they are not always who they are cracked up to be.

I hope my readers keep this in mind as sometimes word travels around and you have to think about who to trust. The people around town? Yourself? Or the person you thought you knew? I hope that everybody chooses wisely and keep believing in whoever you trust the most. I know that I have said before that everybody has imperfections, but sometimes you cannot get past them. So this goes out to my readers, whoever you are. I that you all find someone who is not afraid to share their true colors with you and I hope that you are able to do the same with them (as long as it is safe and healthy). The person (or in this case I think it might be plural) who I wrote this about is a combination of different perspectives and situations. It was not ideal, but I have learned a lot from the experience with them. Learn to trust (always) and happy reading!! P.S. Since we are on the theme of true colors, I will add another poem in the mix as well.

No Hero

It was a hard pill to swallow

Because the truth hurts and

All I wanted to do was follow

 

In your footsteps. The sand

Was sinking me down

Until I could no longer stand.

 

I felt like I was going to drown,

But there was nothing I could do

To stop the whispers in this town.

 

Everybody was speculating and you

Were living up to the hype.

I was starting to feel like the new

 

Girl around these parts. I had to wipe

Away my tears before you saw

Me as weak. I was not your type

 

Of girl. I used to be in awe

Of you until I saw all of the ugliness.

You were no shiny medal. The flaw

 

In the both of us was heartless.

And the darkness of the situation

Was twirling off its axis.

 

Nothing was turning out to be certain

Like I thought it was going

To be. Nobody clearly won

 

This battle. It does have a lot of sting

Because you meant so much to me,

But we were both down to our last swing.

 

I could no longer let you see

Things from my perspective because

Everything had to stop and cease.

 

I paid no attention as each person’s jaws

Dropped to the floor because I never

Cared enough for their claws

 

To sink into us and pin me as the enabler.

Their golden and bad boy could

Never disappoint them. Your honor

 

Was never real. How I wish you would

Show the world who you really

Are and how the bad outshines the good.

 

People always viewed you as godly

And perfect. While I am just

An ordinary girl and I was barely

 

Hanging on as I was. I wanted to trust

You enough so you would never break

Me into pieces, but I was turning into dust.

 

Your True Colors

My feelings were hidden from view.

I never wanted to hide what

I was feeling away from you.

 

Deep down in my gut

And intuition was the truth

That everything was going to cut

 

Me deep. It did nothing to soothe

My irrational fears of you leaving.

It turned out that I saw your true

 

Being and colors shining

On through. I prayed for some

Miracle. I thought it would bring

 

You and I back in rhythm like a drum.

We got out of sync and you were no

Longer a part of this dance. I feel numb.

 

You and I were supposed to go slow,

But I got ahead of myself and wanted

Too much. You gave me this glow,

 

But it has all dimmed. The wall

That I built is going back up.

I am left wandering

 

This world while I suffered the blowup.

You did not have to suffer as much as I did.

You just went on like this was no breakup.

 

You went off the map and grid.

You vanished and disappeared altogether.

We could do nothing to stop this skid.